where is the oil pressure sensor located on a 99 gti 2.0 liter, the oil light flashes every now and then, what can it be.
Ed McCrann
spanway , wa USA - Saturday, August 18, 2007 at 14:24:40 (PDT)
My son has an '86 Camaro, 2.8 V6. The car was always pretty peppy but then it turned sour, it lost power. It reminded me a lot of the old days when timing would make an engine seam lazy. Then bubbles appeared in the radiator indicating a gasket problem. I pulled the heads and had the valves ground and heads surfaced. While the engine was this far apart I figured I would replace the timing set (which was WELL worn) as well. After getting the car back together and test driving, it's still gutless! I am a retired shade-tree mechanic from the "BC" (before computers) era and at a total loss with these new fangled machines. The check engine light comes on when starting but then goes off. What am I missing? Can you give me an idea of what my problem is and hopefully a cure?
Thanks,
Elmer
E. Poltrock
China Spring, TX USA - Saturday, August 18, 2007 at 07:35:01 (PDT)
WHAT IS THE FIRING ORDER FOR A 2000 DODGE DAKOTA 3.9
6 CYLINDER & HOW ARE THE SPARK PLUGS NUMBERED?
David Deck
buffalo, NY USA - Thursday, August 16, 2007 at 09:16:16 (PDT)
need firing order for a 4 cylinder 1995 mazda 626
warren marr
USA - Tuesday, August 14, 2007 at 18:09:42 (PDT)
just know everyone that this is a BS website, don't bother leaving a question. For those with a similar question to mine. It's probably the throttle body! email me magae1372@aol.com
Magea
whittier, ca USA - Sunday, August 12, 2007 at 02:33:51 (PDT)
Is there a cut off switch on the 1986 vw jetta if so where is it.
howard colley
Mecosta, mi. USA - Friday, August 10, 2007 at 19:01:03 (PDT)
my escort gti has had the idle valve changed but it is still reving to about 1500 rpm can you help
michael
burton, staffs england - Friday, August 10, 2007 at 11:00:55 (PDT)
Which valve do I put the freon in with a 2002 VW golf. Which valve is the high valve and which one is the low valve.
athena
sunrise, fl USA - Tuesday, August 07, 2007 at 17:39:47 (PDT)
need picture showing firing order for 626 mazda 1999,6 cylinder
meryl
fort worth, tx USA - Tuesday, August 07, 2007 at 16:40:08 (PDT)
OK here it is i have a 88 olds cutlass supreme 2.8L,One day the car wouldnt start,there was no humming,so we were told to replace the fuel pump,fuel filters and the screen, and we did so, and still no humming...We were talking to a friend and they said they had the same problem theat it was the relay switch we replaced that and still no humming do you know of any solutions??? I would rather try to fix it without taking it to a garage just to keep the cost down. but if you could help that would be awesome
uesday, August 07, 2007 at 15:50:23 (PDT)
How do I open my 2001 Jimmy with a Slim Jim?
Atlasan
Canton, GA USA - Tuesday, August 07, 2007 at 08:17:19 (PDT)
How do I use a slim jim to open my 2001 Jimmy?
Atlasan
Canton, GA USA - Tuesday, August 07, 2007 at 08:16:07 (PDT)
How Many lbs of pressure of freon go into my 1998 4.0 Jeep Cherokee?
John
New London, CT USA - Monday, August 06, 2007 at 16:56:37 (PDT)
Where do I put freon in my 2000 Nissan Sentra?
Mickey Hill
Louisville, KY USA - Monday, August 06, 2007 at 13:56:58 (PDT)
I have a Chrysler Town & Country minivan and the air conditioning leak into the passenger side and gets the carpet wet.
Jean Bertrand
Astatula, FL USA - Monday, August 06, 2007 at 08:38:16 (PDT)
need timing diagram for 1988 toyota tercel 1500
jim
USA - Sunday, August 05, 2007 at 10:35:30 (PDT)
CAN U PLS. TELL ME HOW TO INSTALL OXYGEN SENSOR FROM REAR.
SEND ME SOME EXPLODED VIEW WHERE I CAN SEE IT TO INSTALL THANK YOU.
JORGE SAN JOSE
TORONTO, ON CANADA - Thursday, August 02, 2007 at 07:07:19 (PDT)
mass air flow sensor keeps going out every five :56:03 (PDT)
How do I shut off Oil change light On 2001 Chevy Monte Carlo
David
Airville, Pa USA - Wednesday, August 01, 2007 at 04:19:26 (PDT)
WHRE IS MY COOLING FAN RELAY ON A 1998 CADILLAC DEVILLE AND IS THAT WHY MY FAN WON'T COME ON I ALREADY CHANGED THE TEMP GAUGE SENSOR
MONTY
KANSAS CITY, MO USA - Friday, July 27, 2007 at 21:40:04 (PDT)
WHRE IS MY COOLING FAN RELAY ON A 1998 CADILLAC DEVILLE AND IS THAT WHY MY FAN WON'T COME ON I ALREADY CHANGED THE TEMP GAUGE SENSOR
MONTY
KANSAS CITY, MO USA - Friday, July 27, 2007 at 21:35:12 (PDT)
my 95 ford escort is not getting fuel,i have replaced the fuel pump but no fire is getting to the pump is there a fuel pump relay and were is it.
chris stansel
lula, ga USA - Friday, July 27, 2007 at 16:32:57 (PDT)
I HAVE A 2000 NISSAN MAX THAT DOES NOT HAVE A CHECK ENGINE LIGHT , BUT WHEN I GET ON THE GAS THE CAR IS HOLDING BACK AND THE MOTOR STARTS TO PIN AND PANG. A FRIEND SCAN IT AND SAID IT SAID THE #1 KNOCK SENSOR WAS THE PROBLEM SO I CALLED MDTN NISSAN THE SERVICE GUY SAID THAT IN 7 YEARS HE HAS EVER CHANGE A KNOCK SENSOR THAT IT WAS A O2 SENSOR OR SOMETHING ALONG THOSE. WHAT DO YOU THINK IT COULD BE? PLEASE GET BACK TO ME ASAP. THANK YOU
RONNIE
middletown , NY USA - Friday, July 27, 2007 at 09:39:14 (PDT)
I HAVE A 2000 NISSAN MAX THAT DOES NOT HAVE A CHECK ENGINE LIGHT , BUT WHEN I GET ON THE GAS THE CAR IS HOLDING BACK AND THE MOTOR STARTS TO PIN AND PANG. A FRIEND SCAN IT AND SAID IT SAID THE #1 KNOCK SENSOR WAS THE PROBLEM SO I CALLED MDTN NISSAN THE SERVICE GUY SAID THAT IN 7 YEARS HE HAS EVER CHANGE A KNOCK SENSOR THAT IT WAS A O2 SENSOR OR SOMETHING ALONG THOSE. WHAT DO YOU THINK IT COULD BE? PLEASE GET BACK TO ME ASAP. THANK YOU
RONNIE
middletown , NY USA - Friday, July 27, 2007 at 09:37:24 (PDT)
I HAVE A 2000 NISSAN MAX WHEN I GET ON THE GAS THE CAR FEELS LIKE SOMETHING IS HOLDING IT BACK AND THE MOTOR STARTS TO PIN AND PANG. MY FRIEND SCAN IT AND SAID IT WAS THE #1 KNOCK SENSOR BUT WHEN I CALLED NISSAN THEY TOLD ME THAT WAS A O2 SENSOR OR SOMETHING ALONG THAT LINE. WHAT DO YOU THINK ?
ronnie
middletown, NY USA - Friday, July 27, 2007 at 09:25:12 (PDT)
Why my GMC Jimmy 4x4 96 suddenly turn off after 40 minutes driving?
Ruben Monreal
Monterrey, NL Mexico - Wednesday, July 25, 2007 at 23:33:09 (PDT)
Where is the car jack located in a 1994 Mazda MPV?
Sandy
DULUTH, GA USA - Tuesday, July 24, 2007 at 20:43:32 (PDT)
spark plug wiring diagram for 1990 chev cavelier. 3.1L engine
mark
sault ste, marie, canada - Tuesday, July 24, 2007 at 13:38:29 (PDT)
Are the Sox going to the Series this year?
Dave
Dave Pettmark
Boston, MA USA - Monday, July 23, 2007 at 22:47:49 (PDT)
What do you think is the best Bob Dylan album?
Thanks,
Tom
Thomas Ello
Kincaid, KY USA - Wednesday, July 11, 2007 at 15:48:30 (PDT)
my fuel pump works outside the car but not in curent in the line whats wrong? its a 96 crown vic police
winston
belle glade, fll USA - Sunday, July 08, 2007 at 18:18:55 (PDT)
Why is my 1994 Buick Regal GS, 3.8L V6 Engine dying randomly and sometimes not starting?
Jonny dumser
Indianapolis, IN U Engine dying randomly and sometimes not starting?
Jonny dumser
Indianapolis, IN USA - Friday, July 06, 2007 at 21:29:08 (PDT)
My VW 99 golf GTI 2.0 want pass smog. The OMG fault codes were P0121 TPS Sensor and P0171 System too lean. Any ideas on how I can fix the problem? The check engine light came on about 2 weeks ago. I recently replaced the Fuel tank and have a cold air intake, could either cause a problem??
Magea Masaniai
whitter, ca USA - Friday, July 06, 2007 at 14:02:26 (PDT)
where can I find the fuse for the cigerette lighter that is in the front of my grand plymouth voyager SE 1996? I found one fuse and was good, back lighter works front don't
thank you
brenda youngs
Prattsburgh, ny USA - Monday, July 02, 2007 at 13:25:03 (PDT)
I just bought a code reader for my 1995 GMC Jimmy, it says under the hood that it is an OBD1 but I can't find where to plug it in. Do you know where it might be?
Shaun
Calgary, AB Canada - Sunday, July 01, 2007 at 23:22:57 (PDT)
Hello. Any advice how to check to see if my A/C drain is plugged on my 2002 Crown Vic? This summer I've been getting a very musty smell like my carpets wet. How do I check to diagnose if the A/C drain is plugged or not? Where do I look? How do I unplug it if it is plugged? Thanks!! Mike Vachon
Mike Vachon
Mineral City, Ohio USA - Sunday, July 01, 2007 at 11:52:21 (PDT)
Where is the low side valve located on a 2002 Chrysler Voyager?
Lori
Waco, TX USA - Sunday, July 01, 2007 at 10:50:48 (PDT)
I have a 1993 Ford Taurus, need to know how to put in Freon in the A/C?
KC
Park, Ks. USA - Saturday, June 30, 2007 at 13:15:52 (PDT)
My 1997 plymouth grand voyager ac compressors bearing is making a lot of noise and I am not getting cold air at all????
Angel
las vegas, nv USA - Thursday, June 28, 2007 at 13:02:41 (PDT)
how to refill AC freon gas for a chevrolet cavalier 1993.
2 doors, 4 cylinders. Thank you for any advice. Adam
adam Serwan
Clifton, NJ USA - Thursday, June 28, 2007 at 12:23:45 (PDT)
How to refill Air Conditioner Freon gas, for Chevrolet Cavalier 1993, 2 doors, 4 cylinders.
Thank you for any advice. Adam Serwan
adam Serwan
Clifton, NJ USA - Thursday, June 28, 2007 at 12:18:36 (PDT)
my 1997 z34 monte carlo sputters stutters &diesin90 degree weather cool down 5 min runs ok till the next stop then it dies again can you help me thanks ROD
roderick moore
ticonderoga, ny USA - Thursday, June 28, 2007 at 09:01:50 (PDT)
What is the firing order and position on the block of my 1999 Chev Venture 6 Cylinder engine (V-6). thanking you in advance
Dick Chapin
Grandville, Mi USA - Wednesday, June 27, 2007 at 18:54:57 (PDT)
I have this up tuned gti..all done through a tech at vw its great. Blow off valve and all with fron mount intercooler along with the exhaust and blowoff valve you can hear it well at 20psi1! I just lost boost! I mean it spooled and then poof I had the battery light come on for a sec then the traction light came on?? I have not turned it on again but Im affraid for the worst in the morning. A new Mass air flow sensor was installed through Vw as well under warranty. Its a 2003 with 75000km. email me back also on my email.
Riz
Toronto, on Canada - Sunday, June 24, 2007 at 21:19:30 (PDT)
I have this up tuned gti..all done through a tech at vw its great. Blow off valve and all with fron mount intercooler along with the exhaust and blowoff valve you can hear it well at 20psi1! I just lost boost! I mean it spooled and then poof I had the battery light come on for a sec then the traction light came on?? I have not turned it on again but Im affraid for the worst in the morning. A new Mass air flow sensor was installed through Vw as well under warranty. Its a 2003 with 75000km. email me back also on my email.
Riz
Toronto, on Canada -at causes a 2000 Buick Regal to die and all the instrument lights are flashing
mickeyd60
Dallas, Tx USA - Friday, June 22, 2007 at 17:58:25 (PDT)
Where can I get a vacuum diagram for a 1986 v6 3.8 Mustang?
dave
gloucester, va USA - Wednesday, June 20, 2007 at 18:02:52 (PDT)
how do I change rear brakes on a 1996 nissan sentra
debbie
torrance, ca USA - Tuesday, June 19, 2007 at 11:30:53 (PDT)
How can I replace the EGR Valve on a 1990 Honda Accord and where is it located.
Thanks
jose
passaic, nj USA - Tuesday, June 19, 2007 at 10:17:49 (PDT)
i'm trying to realese the tension so i can put the new timimg belt on a isuzu trooper how and where do i do it
janie case
USA - Sunday, June 17, 2007 at 15:29:10 (PDT)
My code reader says that on my Chevrolet Venture 1999 minivan that the system is lean on cylinder #5. How in the heck do I find which cylinder/plug/plug wire is cylinder #5?
Donner
AR USA - Sunday, June 17, 2007 at 15:06:58 (PDT)
Where is the condensation hose on the air condentioner located on a 2003 dodge dokata?
Loraine Nehls
Arcadia, Ne USA - Sunday, June 17, 2007 at 14:46:45 (PDT)
1993, 4.6 Eldo. How do I shut off "Change Engine Oil" ?
Angel
Los Angeles, Ca USA - Sunday, June 17, 2007 at 10:01:36 (PDT)
where is the low side port on a 1994 pontiac grand am?
will
hammond, in USA - Saturday, June 16, 2007 at 01:14:18 (PDT)
I have a 91 ford escort pony i was told it was my fuel cut off relay but i can't find a diagram or something that will help me find were it is
dustin
dutton, mt USA - Friday, June 15, 2007 at 21:45:40 (PDT)
How do you remove the door panel of a 2001 Chevy Silverado
miles
McClenannville, SC USA - Friday, June 15, 2007 at 18:11:13 (PDT)
where is the feul filter located on a 96 ford escort lx 2 door hatchback w/ a 1.9 liter motor
john
sarasota, fl USA - Friday, June 15, 2007 at 17:19:46 (PDT)
How do I get all da babes to lub me like they lub you?????????????????????
Keith
el cerrito, ca USA - Friday, June 15, 2007 at 11:58:31 (PDT)
`I have a 1993 oldsmobile cutlass supreme and I want to put 22 inch rims on it. what do I have to do to make them fit?
adam
hammond, in USA - Wednesday, June 13, 2007 at 19:35:39 (PDT)
how to set the timoing in 1996 dodge intrepid
Maurice Dewitt
Theodore, Al USA - Monday, June 11, 2007 at 11:37:59 (PDT)
I have a 1996 izuzu rodeo. It has a fairly new rebuilt engine I put in a couple of years ago. When I drive it and come to a stop sign it backfires and dies. It starts back up but no one can figure out its problem. Any ideas?
debra
denton, tx USA - Monday, June 11, 2007 at 10:07:48 (PDT)
What is the firing order for a 96 maxima engine
Willee
Norcross, ga USA - Sunday, June 10, 2007 at 10:47:49 (PDT)
have a leak in hose on 2000 nissan frontier truck and want to know where it is located. why it will cost over 500.00 to replace
barbara donoho
rochelle, il USA - Saturday, June 09, 2007 at 18:52:20 (PDT)
where is the fan relay on the 1993 Mercury Topaz located? Firewall? Fenderwall?
Marie
collins, oh usa - Saturday, June 09, 2007 at 17:23:53 (PDT)
removal and installation of heater core on a 2004 chevy tahoe.
terry steele
columbus, ga USA - Friday, June 08, 2007 at 12:36:02 (PDT)
where is the stater motor for intrepid 2001 2.7l located
micky
toronto, canada - Friday, June 08, 2007 at 08:36:06 (PDT)
96 crown vic starts fine on cold start but after reach normal operating temp. will not restart until cools down sometimes 4 to 5 hours later. restarts and idles fine then. what could be the problem. it is kind of like it is not getting any spark until something cools down.
Finley
science hill, ky USA - Thursday, June 07, 2007 at 15:34:49 (PDT)
where is the fuel filter located in a 1989 chrysler new yorker
cheryl davis
dallas, TX USA - Thursday, June 07, 2007 at 08:32:52 (PDT)
how do i catch the timing belt on my 89 tercel
kevin manley
Vancouver, Canada, BC Canada - Wednesday, June 06, 2007 at 07:43:52 (PDT)
I have A 1987 Ford 351 5.8liter engine. What is the idle oil pressure of this engine the trans is Atuo. I have just paid alot of money to have this truck fixed and the tappets are making noise and the oil pressure says 5.lbs at idle and it doesn't seem to get any higher than 10.lbs off idle .The shop that was paid to fix it says it is right pressure at idle ,then why does it make all this noise and didn't before .I think thet is the idle oil pressure of this engine the trans is Atuo. I have just paid alot of money to have this truck fixed and the tappets are making noise and the oil pressure says 5.lbs at idle and it doesn't seem to get any higher than 10.lbs off idle .The shop that was paid to fix it says it is right pressure at idle ,then why does it make all this noise and didn't before .I think the oil pump wasn't changed as the truck before they worked on it had 25lbs and then would loose pressure off and on when driving it .This truck is not a junker it has always been looked after and serviced it is also a low miles truck and I am the second owner since 1996 .I think the oil pump needs to be replaced .There is no clanking or knocking sounds and the truck has lots of power and doesn't smoke out the back. I paid 1100.00 dollars for this work to be done (the replacement of the pump) and now don't think it was done only a flush was done it sure doesn't look like it was worked on looking at the oil pan .Thanks for any help Len
Len Kowalyshen
Victoria, BC Canada - Tuesday, June 05, 2007 at 14:24:00 (PDT)
which wheel is the belt tensioner for a 1999 chevy malibu
fonz
moore, ok USA - Tuesday, June 05, 2007 at 12:28:58 (PDT)
MY FRONT DRIVER SIDE ENGINE MOUNT NEEDS REPLACING. WOULD THAT BE CONSIDERED THE RADIATOR SIDE?
http://cgi.ebay.com/ebaymotors/MAZDA-626-MX6-FORD-ENGINE-MOTOR-MOUNT-FRONT-BRAND-NEW_W0QQcmdZViewItemQQcategoryZ50454QQihZ014QQitemZ330129794861QQrdZ1QQsspagenameZWDVW
http://cgi.ebay.com/ebaymotors/Mazda-626-MX6-93-00-Front-Engine-Mount-4-Cyl-AT-M_W0QQcmdZViewItemQQcategoryZ50454QQihZ016QQitemZ260125501102QQrdZ1QQsspagenameZWDVW
WILL EITHER OF THOSE WORK PLEASE EMAIL BACK W/ ANSWER ASAP
LAUREN
JAX, FL USA - Tuesday, June 05, 2007 at 12:02:57 (PDT)
i hve changed the plugs rotor cap distribtor cap and coil and my truck still stalls when it runs for about 5 min. then i wait 10 min and it starts up agian its a 1988 gmc 305 pick up 2 wheel drive
kevin l meader
skowhegan, me USA - Sunday, June 03, 2007 at 10:29:52 (PDT)
Were is the the fuel rail component system in the 1989 Mazda 626? Can you e-mail the diagram.
Gabe Moran
Walnut Creek, CA USA - Sunday, June 03, 2007 at 10:24:16 (PDT)
Were is the the fuel rail component system in the 1989 Mazda 626?
Gabe Moran
Walnut Creek, CA USA - Sunday, June 03, 2007 at 10:22:41 (PDT)
I have a 1987 Jeep Cherokee, 4.0 enging. When I accelerate, the air conditioning changes from the dash panel vents and starts coming out the defrost vents. When I let off the accelerator it changes back to the appropriate a/c vents. Can you help me out with the cause and repair of this problem? thanks.
Gerald Gilliam
Litchfield Park, Az USA - Tuesday, May 29, 2007 at 19:44:13 (PDT)
Doctor GTI,
Where can I get a diagram of the steering column for a 1991
Siverado 4x4 truck, gear shift on the column. Hopefully for free!!!
Jean
Denver, CO USA - Tuesday, May 29, 2007 at 15:00:00 (PDT)
I have a 92 Chrylser Lebaron. I can't find the water pump. Is it under the timing belt cover or am I just not recognizing it?? Send Pic's if you have them!!!
Steve Jackman
Salt Lake City, Ut USA - Monday, May 28, 2007 at 17:57:12 (PDT)
What do i need to know about installing 20" spokes on a 97 cadillac seville before i buy em? Do i need to factor in suspension or brake calipers or anything like that or can i just buy em drop em and roll the mutherfuckers?
thanx fer yer help holmes
brian
las vegas, nv USA - Sunday, May 27, 2007 at 20:43:36 (PDT)
DOES A 1996 S-10 HAVE THE SME BOLT PATTERN AS A 1990 CAVELIER
ROMEO
CHAR., WV USA - Friday, May 25, 2007 at 14:32:26 (PDT)
I have an 89 olds cutlass ceria V-6 2.8 My issue is the fuel pump remaiming on to the point were it drains the battery. The pump shuts off normally under regular use. But iam a delivery driver and it seems if it is run for several hours the pump runs constantly. Replaceing the relay didnt work and when i pulled the relay it still was running so i disconected the battery to shut it down.I am affraid the pump needs replaced but that is a labor intensive and costly endevor any clues?
Andy Henry
Seattle, Wa. USA - Friday, May 25, 2007 at 12:29:39 (PDT)
Sweet Mama!! The Doctor is BACK!!! YEHA.
My question, I've been drinking a lot of Diet Mountain Dew. Is Aspartame really good for me? I'm hoping to get cancer. Please help.
Your Pal, Frizzo
Frank Rizzo
Boulder, CO USA - Wednesday, May 23, 2007 at 14:52:30 (PDT)
Doctor GTI, could it really be, after a three year hiatus, that you are back in the saddle again?
Your secret hater/admirer,
Scott
Berkeley, CA USA - Wednesday, May 23, 2007 at 13:29:20 (PDT)
My 84 gti 's temp guage runs at about 3/4 to H. Would running cooler be better for the engine. Would getting a larger radiator help and if so, what car could i get one from to fit in my 84. The motor has 101,000 and is fast as hell.
Thanks
joe mccarthy <joemac311@aol.com>
fitchburg, ma USA - Tuesday, August 31, 1999 at 11:20:47 (PDT)
I take benadryl 50mg. every night for sleep, & have for years. Is this harmful for me? If so what would be better?
Joan Brown <billyjean67@hotmail.com>
Horatio , Ar USA - Friday, August 27, 1999 at 17:26:40 (PDT)
How old is Jar Jar Binks, and what does he have against Testicles?
Glen Allison <sandy@allison.karoo.co.uk>
Hull, England - Saturday, August 21, 1999 at 09:30:06 (PDT)
What is the best cure for hemorroids?
m. reynolds <mg-mcr@centuryinter.net>
forest hill, La. USA - Thursday, August 19, 1999 at 16:26:52 (PDT)
Doctor,I have an very very oily skin,everytime after 30 minutes of washing my face,my face will become back as normal,very oily.To prevent this,I wasedh my face 8 times a day.I have my own skin doctor,the doctor gives me antibiotic for my pimples and a night cream,to prevent my face from oily the next morning.Doctor,please help me because I can't stand it anymore.How to prevent my face from become oily and what to use.
Thank you doctor.Please help href="mailto:bryan_chong@hotmail.com">bryan_chong@hotmail.com>
Kuala Lumpur, KL Malaysia - Thursday, August 19, 1999 at 08:43:47 (PDT)
Hello my admirer, your skin doctor is wrong. He is trying to get you
assimilated to the rest of the p you doctor.Please help href="mailto:bryan_chong@hotmail.com">bryan_chong@hotmail.com>
Kuala Lumpur, KL Malaysia - Thursday, August 19, 1999 at 08:43:47 (PDT)
Hello my admirer, your skin doctor is wrong. He is trying to get you
assimilated to the rest of the pimpled, ricerocket-drivin' kids. You're
better than that, you just don't know it yet. The problem is, you see, in
your balls. You need to have them sucked dry by Jar Jar, and then you'll
notice that you skin condition, and major oiliness will diss mages/dr.jpg"
width="310" height="78" border="0">
Why are so many things round?
Dean <deanhanson@excite.com>
Here, IA USA - Wednesday, June 16, 1999 at 14:09:08 (PDT)
That's a silly question...It's 'cause we like 'em that way!
DrGTi puts his hands up in the air and gropes a pair of virtual big-uns.
If that's not obvious to you than you'd better get to your local Deja Vu(R) strip club and see for yourself.
DrGTi gets an evil smirk on his face...
How do I get the jam from between my toes into a jar.
Well Hung <bigdick@aol.com>
lunar, fu Mars - Friday, June 11, 1999 at 17:35:14 (PDT)
Well Mr. Big One, the best recomendation I've got for you is to hose your
feet off with your schlong right into the jars...If you have a member that
hangs down that far than that shouldn't be a problem for ya. But if you
can't do that with ease, than you shouldn't call it a schlong, but rather a
schlort...Thaaat's all folks!!!
Dear Doctor GTI:
Why do you have a figurine of the gay tele-tubby on top of your computer monitor? Are you gayxor? What's, like, up with that?
Thank you,
Ninja Gaiden <ninja_gaiden666@aol.com>
Berzerkeley, CA US of A - Thursday, June 10, 1999 at 12:13:24 (PDT)
Well Ninja Gaiden, if that is your real name. I'm not gonna lie when I say
that you certainly are one nutty fella, but the truth is that figurine was
just a sign of my THROBING masculinity! Anyway I can't be Fagsor 'cause
JarJar Binks ate my Nutty Goodness. That's all Folks!
I live in an apartment with my brother. Everynight he brings home a new Chinese Lesbian. He says that he has a taste for hungry lesbian's. He likes to stuff them with oatmeal and eat them out. He likes to whip them with noodles and then regurgatate it. I actualrren23@hotmail.com>
Wellesley, MA USA - Monday, June 07, 1999 at 19:44:48 (PDT)
I'm glad you feel comfortable enough to share that kind of melodrama with
me. However that's not nearly so far-fetched as the tales my aunt's,
second cousin's, brother's, roommate's, war buddy told me; now that guy is a whole
'nother story! He used to take home Latin Hermaphrodites (with 7 toes on
each foot), and clip taco shells to their nips as nipple clips. Then he
would fill up the hooch with all the makings for a taco (don't forget the
extra-hot salsa taqueria!!), and then he would put cinnamon and sugar on the
woo-woo-dillie to make a churro out of it! Now that guy was a
phreak-a-doodle-do!
Enjoy your life and get a day job, or else I'm afraid I'll hear from you too much...
P.S. It felt good to get that story off my chest too!!!
How do I get those damn grubs out of my garden? Do you know if they tste good? What would be the best way to cook them, and is it possible to cook them this way while traveling across the country in my neighboor's volkswagon?
WuRM <Idontwanttotellyouthat>
Reston, VA USA - Wednesday, June 02, 1999 at 20:26:50 (PDT)
Well their tastyness is a matter of opinion my friend, but the best
way to cook them is to freeze-dry and stir-fry if you're hangin' with the
homies, or cooking a delicious meal for your inlaws. And the ever-popular
on-the-road approach; which would be to cook them on top of your engine,
while driving. The second approach works great for the travelling
salesperson or the occasional hippie in his/her Volkswagon Bus. Since VW's
are known to overheat like a mofo on long trips, they make the perfect
stovetop for all your grub delights. Hope I've been helpfull, and while I
have your attention, if you have a few spare bucks, and a couple of spare
minutes, please sign up for the "VeeDubs for Grubs" commitee and maybe
you'll get to see me in person at one of our pseudo anonymous meetings. Or
see if you can find it in your heart to send a bunch of money to "Adopt A
Grub", which is a great foundation, co-sponsored by Microsoft(R). Take care
of yourself, my grub-luvin' buddy!
I recently purchased a 1999 Jetta GLX.
When I turn the key, the engine starts.
Is this normal behaviour for a car?
Ian Rees <oneko@weyland-yutani.net>
angleton, tx USA - Monday, May 31, 1999 at 00:56:01 (PDT)
Nooooo!!! That is not normal behavior nd any suggestions?
gina <cjande1501@aol.com>
marion, ia USA - Monday, April 26, 1999 at 12:36:38 (PDT)
For the hemmotroids: take Preparation-H, for the clots: drink some Drano,
and if you think you're anemic: see how many shots of Cuervo 1800 you can
take before you hit the floor, if it's 5 or more you're not anemic yet!
Secondly, if you are having problems on the pooper, eat some suppository
brownies, and pretend they're chocolate. And if you can't stand to live
with the pain anymore, take some cianide and stick a bath scrubber up
your ass so you won't bleed allover the bed as you're watching your
favorite Saturday morning ca>
Can you tell me how many 1998 GTI - VR6's were sold in the US?
J C Albers <jcalbers@megsinet.net>
Carol Stream, IL USA - Wednesday, March 03, 1999 at 20:43:51 (PST)
Well my curious little pal, there were enough 1998 GTi VR6's sold in the
continental US to fill every parking lot in the Galapagos Islands. Now how
about that for a marketing schpiel?
can i use my new volkswagen to make someone
fall in love with me?
marydel tucker <marydel@dropclaw.com>
san francisco, ca USA - Thursday, January 21, 1999 at 16:15:03 (PST)
Yes, you certainly can. The most effective approach I've found yet has
been to hit the lucky gal or (guy) that's caught your eye, at about 40mph
with your GTi and then come back 5 minutes later in a different GTi and
take care of the person, pretending that you had nothing to do with the
accident. Take them to the hospital and sit with them as they recover from
their coma, and when they do, they'll be all yours...Now how about that for
a love story, movie critics eat your heart out!
Can you pump me or I mean my tires?
Don BObbin
Frisco, Ca USA - Tuesday, December 01, 1998 at 20:28:41 (PST)
I am not going to pump you...But
if you want me to pump your tires, you can pay me $40/hour with a 2 hour minimum
charge...Thanx for the offer though... but if I'm going to begin my brand new
lifestyle soon, it's not going to be with you, bud!
Dr GTI I am so glad I finaly got a pro. I was fuching
around with my dub(1974 Scirocco GTI) and I got my idle screw off kilter. IN
your infinate wisdom, how manny turns out will give me over 20 MPG.
The other thing I must ask is can I use permagasket on the shaft to my squirlcage.
Roger Ramjet
San ho, ca Former soviet union - Tuesday, December 01, 1998 at 20:16:55 (PST)
Well, it's not the amount of turns
that's important, but the position of the tachometer after the adjustment. You
want to set the idle so that your tach sits at the apropriate rpm range for
your type of engine (1.6, 1.7, or 1.8?).Usually that range is in the 1000 rpm
somewhere... like my IQ (no jiggity!!!)
Hey Doc,
How much change DID you find under the seats in my GTi? Oh I mean yours. I'm
entitled to half, due to the fact that you bought my Dub. Anyways, on to my
real queston, how can I get a ISDN line at my house? It takes too long do download
my prono flix over my 56k modem.
Dr. GTi (the original) <dr-gti@batnet.com>
SF, CA 420 - Tuesday, December 01, 1998 at 09:02:46 (PST)
Yo, miss batnet, I found absolutely
no change under the seats in my car. What I found in stead was a soiled g-string
underwear (which scarred me for life) hosting a nest of potato bugs!! You think
that's funny? I'll be sure to send them to you via email...
DR. GTI,
Having recently purchased one of those sparkly Eye Mack things, and
having then spoken for approximately 72 hours straight with tech support
at my local internet, I've begun to take note of a problem I think could
possibly be as large and dangerous as (or even more larger and dangerouser
than) that year 2000 Good Times virus thingy people are always talking
about.
I'm worried that maybe we're running out of "dots." By dots, I don't mean
like this <.> (obviously, electricity can be recycled, so of course electronic
dotr>
dots can be reused), but rather the spoken word "dot."
I was around back in the 70s, and maybe you weren't, but I'm sure we didn't
say dot nearly as often as I hear folks (and particularly young folks) batting
it around today. And I personally think it just wasn't meant for so much use.
It's only a little three-letter word, after all.
So what happens when the allotment of "dots" runs out, huh? Will hicks from
hoarded share on inept dialup PPP customers? Will we go to war with our
less "wired" neighbors to the north (the primitive, but deadly Canadians)
for their most-likely huge stash of the word (I would prefer not to type it
again,
in case you move your lips while you read or are reading it aloud for the
benefit of a favored pet)?
This bothers me.
Any suggestions?
Thanks,
Worried
Worried in Wisconsin <ohmy@musicslut.com>
Bendston, WI USA - Monday, November 30, 1998 at 14:19:17 (PST)
Dear Worried:
Let me begin by saying that I feel your pain acutely!
Back in the 50's when people starting saying "fuck" way too often,
I too thought that the beauty in this beautiful word would soon be extinguished.
But, what happened my big bhs friend? The word only grew stronger! A meager,
single syllable, f-word, grew up into such massive dominance that it's now used
everywhere! Around the world! Around the clock! Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck! Fuck you, fuck me!
If you're really concerned, you should write an email
to those fuckin' geeks writing IP 2.0 and tell them to use commas instead of
dots. I actually think that would actually make a lot more sense. Muzik-Slut-Comma-Com?
Baby!
But seriously, if the use of DOT continues on its current
path, it is certainly destined for something great. It will probably become
yet another attempt at describing the vacuum that lies between the sublime and
the beautiful. It's gonna try to pin that feeling whereas you look at a really
bitchin' piece of art and it makes you feel like you could die any moment, and
not from the chemicals in the paint. Dude, we need more words that describe
that little death that can happen absolutely anywhere. Personally I have
a deep supply of faith that these words will come, and if not from dots, then
from some other point in the aether, and that afterwards the world will be an
incredibly better place to live. Yo! Yo!
So don't fret for the hard work of your precious dot
word; it's a noble path to be on. It's the quest for glory. And that's a path
that can kill you, but also it can bring glory, and some words seem to think
that that's an okay chance to take, for glory. (Coincidentally, that's the same
path I'm on. That's why I'm so attuned....)
What is a good color for a Chocobo? Gold or Red ?
Red xIII <red@chocobo.com>
midgar, - Tuesday, November 24, 1998 at 12:59:29 (PST)
I would go RED, like bozo the clown, yo....
When will the great turkey liberation begin?
Do you feel the turkey-rabbit love within you, Dr. GTI?
How many licks does it take to get to the center of a turkey, er I mean, Tofurkey?
How many questions do you accept at a time?
Thank you O Gracious One,
Hot CoTur-RL (Hoth-based Coalition for Turkey-Rabbit Love) <hotcoturl@qqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqq.ht>
Classified, This too is classified Also Classified - Tuesday, November 24, 1998 at 12:38:51 (PST)
Come Thursday morning, all the turkeys will rise from their Safeway
freezers in a meager attempt to take over the world, instead they will
just piss a lot of people off...
I'm afraid I feel it not...
Well, it would take... "CRUNCH" uhm, oops...I guess we'll never
know...
As many as you can ask without disrupting the molecular composition
of zinc-oxide...
I own a '98 Civic EX. How can I make my car go as fast as yours? Do you recomend 3 point safety harness seatbelts?
The Sandman <drgtirulez@thesandman.com>
Bezerkeley, CA USA - Tuesday, November 24, 1998 at 12:13:40 (PST)
No, you need a 4-point race harness, NOS, monza exhaust...
third testicle......
Bonjour Monsieur GTI!
I am Monsieur DeGrimm and I will get medieval on your derierre!
How do you like me now?
-MDG
Monsieur DeGrimm <mdg@DeGrimm.com.fr>
Marseille, N/A France! - Tuesday, November 24, 1998 at 10:02:45 (PST)
Ok, Mr MGD...But, if you are a distinguished French
Gentleman, then why do you share your initials with a piss-like, American, bottomoftheline
beer?? I mean.... DAMN!!
Hi Doctor GTI:
I'm sort of in a bind. My modem is one of those ubiquitous "Global Village 56k" models, but it won't work. I can't get the darn turkey to decode that .hqx crap. What is an hqx and why do they want to hurt me so bad?
Thanks,
JohnM
John Martina <martinaj@lmi.net>
San Frandisco, CA USA - Tuesday, November 24, 1998 at 09:39:34 (PST)
The answer is in the stuffing my friend...The turkey will never be
able to decode all the hqx files, unless you remove some of the stuffing
out of its ass...
Does a test tube baby have a belly button?
Frank Rizzo <bhs@4-2-0.com>
Helmut, SW USA - Thursday, November 19, 1998 at 12:51:20 (PST)
Not only a belly buton, but a belly as well my bh friend...
My car makes a sound when it runs. It is a 1913 VW Jetta
Deluxe. Please tell me in detail exactly what the problem is and how to solve
it.
Thank you,
Kaliya
Kaliya <knso@lmi.net>
Berkeley, CA USA - Thursday, November 19, 1998 at 12:28:36 (PST)
Well, I'm sorry to have to inform you of this, but they
did not have Jetta Deluxes in 1913, but if they did, and it did make a sound,
I would prbably say it's a good thing, because cars usually do that...
What were the skies like when you were young?
The Sandman <thesandman@thesandman.com>
Berkeley, CA USA - Thursday, November 19, 1998 at 11:49:16 (PST)
When I was young there were no skies. And we never got
there! there were no skies. And we never got
there! And we were damn greatfull! And Doctor GTI was on the crossfader 24/7!
And we went out and oppressed the animals!
What happened to the people who did not
pass the "Pepsi Challenge"?
Schoolio <rrs@lmi.net>
San Frencisco, CA USA - Wednesday, November 18, 1998 at 21:51:34 (PST)
Well Rob, if you had the knowledge and
massive patience it required to pass the pepsi challenge, and if you read
the whole message printed on the back of the can...You would be ovewhelmed
for a few days, but soon enough, you would be enlingtened, and see at last,
that there is no "e" in San Francisco...
Why do some people pluck out all their eyebrows and then draw them back in
with a brown pencil? Do they really think they're fooling anyone?
Babs McGillicuddy <verbila@there.net>
Bezerkely, CA US of A - Wednesday, November 18, 1998 at 19:22:12 (PST)
Yes the brown ones sure fool me... But what if you
were to get to close to the stove one day, and singe off all your eyebrows,
would'nt you at least want brown pencil marks up there hmmmmm...if not brown,
then what other color? Poople?
Hey Dr. Gti, do you know if there exists an Dr. Type III?
Nostalgicly,
Matt
Matthew Hebert <hebes@dropclaw.com>
Oaktown, Ca USA - Wednesday, November 18, 1998 at 17:58:53 (PST)
If you are ready to join my quest fot glory, and
Rabbit independence throughout the land, then you have made a step in the
direction of being a great Doctor like myself, and maybe some day you can
be my sidekick and we could have wonderful adventures in the realm of our
own, twisted reality...
Why a gti?
leow <geowrath@hotmail.com>
berekely , ca USA - Wednesday, November 18, 1998 at 17:48:02 (PST)
Why did you misspell Berkeley? Why do ball park franks
plump when you cock 'em? Gee, man, I don't believe you....
t">
Where do babies come from?
Julie Martinez <Julie@lmi.net>
Oakland, CA USA - Wednesday, November 18, 1998 at 17:46:57 (PST)
Well, when's your next day off?? Y-Y-Y-YO!
Will you take a Berlitz Japanese course, come to my house every Saturday
night and personally translate Iron Chef for me, my boyfriend, our cat,
and a glow-in-the-dark skeleton? There may be a Volkswagen in the neighborhood.
Those Chinese, they are so gristly <chessie@lmi.net>
USA - Wednesday, November 18, 1998 at 17:45:00 (PST)
Iron Chef is a nonchalant publication of typical
western thought. It is overstated, and would make your cat choke on a hairball
midway through the first page...As for the VW, with all the time I just
saved you two, I need some new rims, maybe the one in your hood has some
fatty alloys...; )
Dear doctor,
What does GTI stand for? Why is it a bunny?
Thank you,
drtboi (not Dr. T-Boi, though)
Todd Meister <drtboi@musicslut.com>
Oakland, CA USA - Wednesday, November 18, 1998 at 17:40:23 (PST)
GTI = Gran Turismo Injection.
Bunny is another name for Rabbit, which was the name that VW gave to their
Golf models that were being sold in the US.
Doctor GTI, why do birds suddenly appear whenever you are near?
Regards,
Scott
Scott Ralston <scottr@lmi.net>
Berkeley, CA USA - Wednesday, November 18, 1998 at 17:20:06 (PST)
Because of my lovely perfume? No, but they love to
shit on my car...
Doctor GTI, why does the grass grow??
Scott
Scott Ralston <scottr@lmi.net>
Berkeley, CA USA - Wednesday, November 18, 1998 at 17:19:30 (PST)
Well Scotrrrrrr! So that you can't see all the dogshit
at the park offcource ; )
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